我好像是个笨蛋

平常人的周末应该很多姿多彩吧。。
而我的呢？
就是无聊的呆在家里。。真的很无聊
有时想要出门又怕没人照顾妈妈，但是她的眼中永远看不到这些。。
一旦我要出门，她就会埋怨我没有陪他。。
那我的生活呢？我就没有了自己的生活。。
为什么我有哥哥姐姐。。但是没有人要在家里。。
先出门的人就赢了，而我永远是那个被抛在后面。。
最后，连门也不能出。。
还要帮那些人洗衣，为他们善后。。

我就像是笨蛋，做这么多,得到的也只有埋怨。。

人类为什么要等到差点失去才会珍惜？

最近妈妈一直都不舒服。。我们也没有特别去关心她，因为我们一直以为只是旧毛病，胃痛。。
后来，经过详细的检查才发现妈妈的pancreas生了一个瘤，而且其实已经很大了。。
真的很后悔，好后悔没有关心妈妈，好后悔没有早点叫她去做身体检查。。
好后悔每次对妈妈漠不关心。。好后悔把妈妈对我的好当成理所当然。。
好后悔到现在才知道后悔。。

看到妈妈这么老了还必须挨刀，我真的很心痛。。
为什么妈妈每次都要承受这样的折磨。。
经过这件事，我决定以后要对妈妈好一点，一定要关心她的健康。。
不能再这样把妈妈的好当成理所当然。。
妈妈一定要好起来。。我要好好地孝顺你和爸爸。。

天上的神啊，请您一定要保佑我的妈妈。。让她早日康复。。

我爱妈妈，爸爸，和我的家人。。

高兴与失望交际

上个星期四刚拿到这半年来所付出的回报，其实数目真的很可观，我应该很高兴的。。
终于，个人保险，车子的保险，还有台湾的旅费都有着落了。。
甚至我还可以提前要绑牙的计划。。
本来的我应该很高兴。。
但是。。
我觉得之前所期盼的好像已经达不到了。。
他们好像决定换人选。。而且，还是一个，我从来没有把他当竞争对手的人。。
真的好失望。。。好难过。。。
应该开心的时候却因为对自己的期盼和要求，被一个残忍的事实所影响。。。
好不想接受这个现实。。。希望这只是我自己的胡思乱想。。。

可能是时候自我检讨，可能自己的性格，这么的不成熟，才会造成没被选上的原因。。
可能我真的需要好好地思考。。可是，现在的觉醒。。。还来得及吗？
我还有机会实现我的理想吗？还是要等到她登上更高峰后，我才有机会往上爬？
我。。。还要再等几年？。。是我太好高骛远了吗？
什么都不能做的我，只有等待这个残酷的事实的来临，一个我不想接受的事实。。

Busy Yet Happy

have been so busy recently and i have no time to update my blog..
work load has been increasing..taking up more and more account..
but i wont complain and i dont feel like complaining..
because i know i will get what i deserve in August...

finally i know that the more we work the more we learn
feeling really lucky to work in Samtec, thank god i left my previous company..
otherwise, i wouldnt know how big the world is, how a good company should be..
and how should we work and i understand something which is very important
"you wont lose anything when you work more"

thanks to my senior, she really taught me alot and she gave me alot of recognition..
she think i can achieve something in my career and because of her,
i really put a lot more efforts in my work
i hope i can help others and also help the company, and also help myself!!!!
hope in the near future i can really achieve something...

JIA YOU, xiao fen

天气好热！！

最近天气好热
真的感谢发明冷气的人！！
谢谢你了，不知名的人～～

有一点动心

昨天又遇见他了，被大家作弄说我喜欢他
原本也觉得没什么，因为这也只是一个玩笑
后来晚餐又再见面，我也没什么和他聊天，因为他的英文有时真的不是听得很懂。。哈哈
大老板叫我们坐在一起，就是故意要作弄我们。。
因为害羞，我真的不敢跟他讲太多话，就假装忙东忙西的。。
后来还是摆脱不了老板的作弄。。
不知道为了什么突然叫他亲我的脸，他问我介意吗？当然不会啦！！
那就是他亲我的第一次。。后来大家看到了说要拍下证据，又再亲了一下。。
真的有点像明星让狗仔队拍的感觉。。哈哈
后来，我们就开始聊天。我也发现他其实真的很厉害。。
他是洋人，他会说华语，他会读华语，他还会唱华语歌，更可怕的他还会唱广东歌。。
我真的觉得他好厉害，电脑知识有超强。。哇！！老天爷，他也未免太完美了吧！！

慢慢的，我们就越来越好，聊得越来越多。。
我教他华语，他教我英文。。
后来，说到要拍全体照。。。大老板叫我坐在他们两中间。。
我想可能只是要我坐在他旁边而已吧。。。
那知道，当我们准备要拍的时候，他们两个男人竟然有趁机亲我！！哈哈
还一定要留照片为证！！天啊！！也好趁机让他在亲我~~yohoo!!

他真的被灌得很醉，离开前他很用力的抱着我。。
应该真的很醉了吧。。。其实真的有种冲动想要亲他。。但是我还是忍住。。哈哈
他一直重复的对我说：“i will be back, bt i dont know when"我点点头。。
他又重复的说：“我会回来的，我不知道什么时候”

我一直想，他跟其他的人说了什么，是一样的话吗？
但是真的很开心可以有这么一个难忘的一天。。
我看到他和另一个女同事合唱广东版的《我的回忆不是我的》，真的很羡慕。。
我一定要学会这首歌，下次找机会等他来的时候和他一起去唱歌。。

祝我好运！！

对人生的感慨

最近发生了一些事...终于把心中许许多多的不满都发泄出来...
一直以来，我们都为了维持和谐的生活一直忍气吞声的和哪些人生活着..
没想到..他...不只爱利用别人，爱说三道四，爱搬弄是非，他自以为是，蛮不讲理...
更可恶的是，他不仅小气还爱打小报告，颠倒是非，简直是男人的耻辱...

他之前对我们所说的那些无聊的话，我们都一笑置之，想说他是长辈就让让他..
没想到他变本加厉，越来越过分..
最近因为某些原因我们和他起了冲突，我们只是把事情的真相说了出来...
他尽然说我们没有尊敬长辈，还跟我妈说，如果我们没有跟他道歉就要和我们断绝关系..
听了之后，我更是火上加油...
但心里想了想，和他断绝关系对我家来说是百益而无一害的..
我把不得马上登报跟他脱离关系！！
感谢老天成全我多年的心愿..

只是，让我感到心酸的是我可怜的妈妈..
她被迫忍受那些指责， 又为了不让我们遭受那些没头脑的人的职责，自己一个人忍受...
事情发生后，我看清了很多很多...
我突然很讨厌一些我曾经尊敬的人..
我觉得他们是非不分，也许他们的心已经瞎了..
被一些不确实的假象，一些编造的事实所蒙蔽...
所以不能怪我们不尊敬这些人，是他们根本不值得我们的尊敬..

像过山车的心情

星期六的心情真的像是坐过山车一样..
上午去了一趟我的学校，想要拿下个学期的课本..
才发现上学期的成绩已经出炉了...好紧张..
心想最好可以考到好成绩，就能申请奖学金... 毕竟想要免费读书嘛~~~
成绩果然考得不错，全科A！！
Yeah!! 可以申请奖学金了!! 可以不用付学费了！！

晚上要去保险公司的庆功宴..
心想打扮每一点可能有机会吸引到“他”的注意..
没想到，他却带了他的女朋友，而且女朋友长得挺可爱的...
心灵大受打击...不过，幸好有一班好朋友朋友度过那漫长的夜晚..
哈哈.. 其实也还好了，只不过以后少了一点去开会的推动力..
最难过的是他其实也挺能干的，失去大鱼才最可惜..哈哈

后来，我们吃完庆功宴后就去唱歌!!
好开心呀！！好久没有唱歌了..
而且我们对歌的爱好还挺相似的，好开心哦！！
但最让我开心的是。。。。。。
居然有歌迷在外面聆听我美妙的歌声~~~
还比手赞好呢！！哈哈！！

心情起起伏伏，真的好奇妙
人生的经历真的太神奇了~~
这也许就是生命的奥妙~~

Finally finished my exam for both WOU and SPM Chinese
Now gotta put all efforts on my work
but so tired..
these few days i worked until 7pm..
so Kelian T.T

i just realised Yong Sen gt girlfriend edi
so sad T,T
gotta stop my an lian life edi
T.t.

Matt, our company MIS came frm US
look quite handsome, like fido dido (remind me of Kevin Siah)
he is quite kind le friendly
but leaving back sooon, to US i guess..
aih.. again.. din gt to see handsome guy in my company T.t
urgh....

I Love Monday Meeting!!

2009/11/23
Yeong Shen Said Bye Bye To Me!!

Happy Day!!!!
YohoooooOO!!

JIA YOU XIAO FEN

Sometime i think maybe i need to change myself..
because i used to treat people too friendly and joke with me..
so some people might think that i am not serious
or they might think i am not trustworthy?

or they might think i really don't mind them joking with me..
or maybe they think that's a joke
but i felt disagreement...

maybe it's time for me to get more serious and don't joke with people who i don't regard them as my friends anymore..
maybe they are just passer-by in my life, so don't take it too seriously..

It's okay to have disagreement from all these shallow people...
all these people will only make me get stronger!!

风筝会飞，是因为逆风
人会成长，是因为逆境

jia you, xiao fen!!!

My Colleague called Venus

I have a new colleague called Venus,
The very first moment she told me her name, i reminded of Truly Mars & Venus..
I came to learn about this book last year
Thanks to myself and Evelyn for making a trip to KL last time
Thanks to Saywei for inviting us to her friend's birthday celebration
Thanks to Bryan for borrowing me THIS book!!

I remembered something stated in this book..
Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus
We should accept that we come from different origin
Women are advised to accept men as who they are
But we usually try to change men to what we want...

So....
i think i should acknowledge this statement
we should accept men as who they are and don't expect them to change for us or to change them
so.....
i started to search for guy whose behavior or everything is at my acceptable level
and....................................
i..... found.......... N........O.........NE!!!!!!

Wahaha..

Not a Bad Day

Today i gt lesson..
what motivates me to go for lesson is actually a HANDSOME classmate..
hiak hiak..
besides pretty teacher la~~

He din come for the last lesson,
luckily i gt to c him this time~~
Hiak Hiak..

and most happily
we got arranged in the same group for discussion~~
HOORAY!!!
and~~
we got to Perform TOGETHER~~
YOHOO!!
and what's more?!!
He asked what's my name~~
YOHOO!!
bt i din get the chance to tell him..
thanks to this group member la!!
interrupted our conversation..
after that i gt no chance to talk to him edi lo
HMPH!!
bt still better than nothing la~~
haha

Exhausted

Exhausted

疲惫

Tired

累

Exhausted

疲惫

Tired

累

Tired

Exhausted

好累

Holiday

today i gt holiday replacement so i din have to wake up early
i lied on my bed for so long..
was thinking something, a lot of things..
this song kept running in my mind...
"我努力想起你笑着哭泣
让自己深爱你再学会放弃
我不想忘记你
就算可以
我宁可记得所有伤心
我努力想起你苦也没关系
用祝福和感激勇敢失去你
爱你这个决定
虽然艰辛
我不说对不起"

This song is called 我不想忘记你，by 郭静
i kinda like this song..
especially this part :
让自己深爱你再学会放弃

4gt bout this song..
next time only share with u all~~ ^^

i went to bukit indah jusco with vivian n edwin
AGAIN!!
cuz i wanted to buy thing from Padini..
i bought a watch and purse..
thn they told me gt this promotion, buy 3 items with original price and get 20% discount
i was trying to get the 3rd item..
so vivian was forced to chose a necklace to make it 3 items~~
Thanks Vivian, i gotta acknowledge your contribution..
blek!!
u know!!these 3 items after 20% discount still RM90++
i forgot the exact figure but its more then RM90++

thn we shopped again in Jusco
thn i bought a pair of heels..
cuz why?! vivian said i was too short..
n this heels just so happened to be there..
its purple colour which just match my clothes..
so i bought it lo~~
okla, this heels nt bad..
next time have to wear it for shopping..

thn we met edwin who forgot to brush his teeth today
he kept asking us to smell his breath
OMG!! where gt ppl like dat de...
>.<
老天爷，为什么我会有这种朋友？！！

after that, i pulled them to buy clothes for my niece
my mum forced me to do so de~~
okay, this was when i like my friend so much
they actually talked sumthing SIAO in front of other people
“都跟你讲了，不要这么早生孩子
现在孩子的爸爸在哪里？你看，就是太早生孩子了，现在没钱买衣服给他咯！”
越讲越爽，一唱一和
those passengers were looking at me with that kind of face...
aih...
but dat was fun!! cuz i like to make fun of people
they looked funny when they buy our story~~
WAHAHAHAHAHA!!

i came back at around 4.30pm...
thn i saw this...
credit card statement
i thought bank 4gt to send me statement or i was wishing mayb bank doesnt have my records
haha..so naive..
wah~~
i actually spent RM648.34 last month with my credit card..
don noe how am i going to pay this..haha

my car no petrol edi..
need to pump again..
i wonder why my petrol seemed to finish faster and faster..
bt i need to tahan it until end of this week..
cuz weekend gt 5% rebate on petrol..
n i need to spend more on shopping since this card gt 20% rebate on retail spend~~
WAHAHA!!
im quite a wise spender,rite?! @.@

today i spent more than RM100++
u see!!
holiday, i spend instead of earning...
sometimes i prefer working..
at least its more productive... ^^

Fruitful Day

Today is quite fruitful cuz i did lots of things..
early in the morning, i wanted to wake up and go toilet release myself then go slp again..
my mum was mopping the floor then i asked her wat time isit
she told me it was about 9.00 am..
thn i suddenly remembered about this insurance talk..
so i went to check my hp see if my leader gt call me o anything..
thn i saw 2 missed calls and 1 sms, all from my leader..
message written that he will pick me up at 9.15am!!
shit!! already 9.00am and i left 15minutes!!
so i quickly brushed my teeth, washed face and bathed..
and just anyhow pick an outfit...
emm, about 9.20am his wife came and fetched me and we went for breakfast tgt..
which was a quick one cuz we were running late..
fortunately, we managed to reach this Grand Paragon at 10.00am..
so the talk started..
This was an insurance talk, title was
this was quite an encouraging talk and it really motivated me to fight for wat i want...
put in your effort and you will realise your dream..make your life colourful...
nothing is impossibe!! when will i get my first 100 millions!!haha
ok,this talk ended at 12.30pm bt i stayed there until 1.30pm..
get to know some people, they are all very successful sales person and they are really rich!!
i tell myself, one day i must be like them~~
dreaming no harms rite?!

ok!!then second half of my day!!
i went sutera mall to meet this lala moi and at the wind..
thn went this don noe wat taste buds o wat restaurant for drinks and also story telling la, of course..
thn we went big mouth, yohoo!! singing session!!!
3 hours RM54, each person has 2 drinks!!
i tink quite worth it la cuz i sing until very tired, until i gt no energy to sing anymore~~
y?! cuz vivian sore throat ma, no one fight with me edi~~!! heehee
bt this underground couple hor ( vivian and at the wind )
kept laughing at me..say i spoilt their favourite song la wat la..say me zao xia somemore..
haha..
nvm, one day if i become superstar then u all know!!

don ask for my autograph hor i warn you!!
ok!!this big mouth gt promotion, spend RM50 and above and we gt da chance to play this spin spin thingy..thn we asked vivian to play lo since she din really sing much..
aiya,she really suey..do wat oso suey..kena this buy 5 free 1 voucher..
aiya...the reception counter there no need to spin also can gt edi..haha...think so valuable meh!!

then we went for dinner..
ok,shall skip this part cuz wat i ordered was not nice at all!!
haha!!!
i planned to go home after dinner cuz i was too ooooo tired already so i sent them to sutera mall
to get the car and i drove back myself..

thn this vivian..
i tink she purposely left her keys in my car....
purposely want me to go her house..
ok..so i went her house to return her keys...
and she kept asking me to go her house..
say wat i give u present edi ma so u must come my house la wat la!!

nothing i could do just went down and started our mahjong session!!
wahahaha!!
this was really nice cuz my house hor...
my dad refused to play with me, my mum don noe how to play,
my sis wants to play bt don wanna play money ( wats the use?! )
so i went vivian's house to play lo~~
hiak hiak~~
with my skill~~i won money wor!!
not very much bt better than at the wind la..
cuz he lost until lao sai!!hahaha!!
actually i seriously think that im quite a good mahjong player..
juz i don noe how to count da "fan"..
otherwise i sure become gamble queen!!
bt then time flies...i promised my mum to go home at 10.30pm..
so i came back lo..otherwise i wouldnt go back sooo early...cuz elson was there~~
WAHAHAHA!!
my future husband le~~
but better don let him see so much of my gamble face la..
later he scared thn i cant be vivian's sis in law edi~~
aunty will be very very sad de la~~

ok!!i will train both my singing and mahjong skill!!
next time i wanna kill vivian and at the wind in both singing and mahjong!!
WAHAHAHAHAa

My Hand Is Aching

Customer Service is actually not an easy job
Cuz i need to face the computer, play with keyboard and mouse the whole day
Somemore when our company is emphasize on Sudden Service
we need to act on customer request spontaneously
the whole day i need to work with Mouse..
Alamak, my arm really aches la... T.T
Who can advice me how to coordinate mouse and hand so that my hand wont feel so SUAN..

Urgh~~
I realised my inbox message is accumulating
But i cant keep them for more than 48 hours without taking action!!
Tomorrow really need to finish Monday pending job and get something new started!!!
Otherwise sure i kena nagged by my Manager~~

looking forward tomorrow sushi dinner!!!
motivate myself to complete my work fast so that i can enjoy my dinner peacefully~~
haha!!

I am now an OFFICIAL insurance agent

10/10/2009
Announcement
Mendel Lee Siau Huan is now an official insurance agent
She will represent Great Eastern Insurance Company

OKOK!!
For now, all of my friends who are still studying..
I wont approach you all...
But dont forget to find me when you all are interested to be insured okay~~
Let me belanja you and give me business la!!

One more side income is coming into me!!
YOHOO!!

JIA YOU,Mendel!!

Sushi Treat

One month old in Samtec

Today, my manager treated us lunch as a celebration for my one month old in Samtec!!
We went Er Chong Wan Tmn Sutera
Need to make reservation in advanced huh!!
haha..
Very Happy cuz i can choose wat cuisine i want..
This is my celebration ma, of course~~
HEEHEE


Eat quite lots of food le, including desert ( cuz my manager and HOD both like desert very much)
emm...
To return their kind gesture..
i tink i need to work even harder
work properly ar..xiao fen!!
be more systematic!!
haha....
actually this week i edi started to be more organised and systematic..
hope things get better ya!!

10/10/2009..
not only ni and my bro's bday..
i need to sit for insurance agent test...
don noe can pass anot..
hope can pass la..
one more side income!!
haha..

JIA YOU, XIAO FEN!!
~MENDELIVIUM~

Need To Buck Up

this week made lots of mistakes in work...
and since im still under probation, this really would affect my performance..
that's why..i was very worried about my performance review..
Mistakes that i had committed :
1. Sent email to wrong buyer...
2. Do opposite as buyer's request..
These are very big mistakes...urgh~~

Review comes..
1. my superior thinks that i am not systematic enough..
i really agree to it..
cuz i seemed to be very busy for this week and sometimes i cannot really arrange my time..
so i must really work on it and improve myself..
hope next month review my performance will be better...

2. she stated that i need to understand the importance of teamwork
This statement sounds like im selfish and do not work in team..
but then she told me, it is like we need to cross train each other so that next time we can back
up each other when we on leave...
so i need to be familiar with my accounts so that i can teach others easily..

3. i need to quickly get all the accounts from my another colleague.
Though she said im a fast learner but then she said my progress of taking over is abit too
slow..
think i have to work faster and learn how to handle all these accounts better..

this is the first time i gt job review under probation,
its quite disheartening to have negative comments...

Never Mind, Mendel!!
Jia YOu!!
Do your best and show improvement for next month!!!!

JIA YOU!!!